Thursday, August 25, 2011

Voices CarryTo Friday- Poem Share






















Are we immune to our surroundings? How often do we just sit and listen to the silence? Does your mind speak louder than white noise?

Yes, I think way too much. Or so I have been told.

(Poem removed by author for submissions)

I stumbled upon a great video poem site, Moving Poems by Dave Bonta. (Toon, you should start checking these sites out, and join us/share your work via creative writing teacher/poet, Jessie Carty's 'Blog' site!) Well, really it was through Diane Lockward's 'Blogalicious' recommendation where I found this wonderful blog. I could spend hours in that site. And it did inspire something.

You can go watch Raymond's video poem Orphan's here, but do not turn down the volume, and yes, I really did watch a show on television with the fan on and no way to hear them talking, and the rest is...in the poem.

6 comments:

Toon said...

Nice cinematic poem! I bookmarked the sites you suggested. I don't know much about poetry which I think is why I enjoy writing it.

Jessie Carty said...

Wonder if you could somehow work in more context to the title. What kind of show was it? I love the war imagery you start weaving in. Only line that didn't seem as necessary was: making confessions in silence.

Such great stuff here though!

Chef E said...

Maybe 'My Eyes Are Listening'

I can see that being weak Jessie!

Jim K. said...

That's a pleasant romp!
I think a fuzzy patch could
be honed by doing:
"mind filled with"
-->
"mind filled in with"

Those who make confessions in
silence a lot probably savor it
more...heh. (moi)
You could make it less passive
and pick up some sounding with
"confessing in silence", though.
Or cop to the popular
hyper-eloquence shtick with:
"confessing to the silence"
or turn the volume to 11 with
"confessing sighs
to the mocking skies"
...hahaa..sorry, just
rumbusticating al flagrante there.

Debbie said...

What an interesting poem, Elizabeth! Wow! Such a cool thought and how you turned it all out.
Loved the comments too!
Thanks Elizabeth for keeping it going here!

Pearl said...

a good exercise. words are just the Ent version of communication. real speed is body language.