A friend of mine to whom I have only known for a few years was diagnosed with a rare form of Pancreatic Cancer- after it was all too well settled into her body. Chemo is not working, and they gave her six months, maybe a year. She is only 44 years old. Barely married to Joe for less than ten years, Lisa is a beautiful person inside and out. She looks like Jackie-O and dresses like her too.
Right after Anelisa died, I met a woman named Jo Wagner. We were friends for two years, when she also got cancer. She was the biggest inspiration, and one of my biggest cheerleaders. Not a day goes by I do not think of her and smile. I miss her. I miss Lisa. I want to go have lunch with her and laugh.
Somehow we have to go on with our life, and remember the beauty that crosses our path; its hard. Life sucks now and then...I honestly love everything in this world...even you!
Go over and read What's Cooking With Doc- Chaos
Oh, and even though I love ya- don't give me this "They are in a better place" crap. I can tell you that so many people who have been through losing someone, they have also told me it is the worse thing you can say to a grieving person! Just a hug will do...
6 comments:
Elizabeth life can be tuff and seemingly so unfair. This is terrible news & I am very sorry this has happened to you & your beautiful friends. I too have lost a dear friend to cancer. I have written about her in my blog. She was diagnosed with inoperable, incurable liver cancer whilst pregnant with twins. Sadly we had to say goodbye to all 3 of them.
I think people generally use words "they're in a better place" and other such phrases because they have no idea what else to say. They're at a loss for words and many times have not experienced loss. I think being able to tell people what you want is a GOOD thing! So a BIG HUG to you & your friend.
"...and I think of each life as a flower, as common
as a field daisy, and as singular,
and each name a comfortable music in the mouth,
tending, as all music does, toward silence,
and each body a lion of courage, and something
precious to the earth.
When it's over, I want to say all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.
When it's over, I don't want to wonder
if I have made of my life something particular, and real.
I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,
or full of argument.
I don't want to end up simply having visited this world."
The last half of a poem called When Death Comes by Mary Oliver
Yeah and it is so hard sometimes...I am so sad about buffalo...I can't believe he's gone!
I'm sorry your friend is ill -- for her, and for you.
there is a poet who comes to the open mike i attend once a month who has stage 4 breast cancer which is terribly sad but she is so inspiring. i admire how she still takes a hold of life and shakes what she can out of it. hang in there!
Thanks for pointing out just how idiotic those cliche' words of comfort really are. Words seldom help at times like this, but some can even hurt.
Post a Comment