Saturday, October 15, 2011

Come Alive

After watching Oprah Winfrey's 'Lifeclass' show, which I admit years ago, maybe fifteen or more, I watched her show on a regular basis with friends in the salon (break room). Eventually I grew tired of being tied down to the television, like in the past. I was more of a get out of the house person. Walking or other things, just staying active. So why now? Because Rosie has a new show on the OWN, Oprah Winfrey Network and Oprah comes on afterwards.

When I write T.V. often is left on as background noise, like now. But her show today has brought tears to my eyes. She is so thoughtful, genuinely giving, and wants for everyone to discover her road to happiness. It has also reminded me of how I wrote Oprah a few emails back in the day. Being a mom of a terminally ill daughter and healthy son, and a husband who couldn't keep a job, I felt the urge to ask for help. What kind of help? I wasn't exactly sure. So I never wrote another email.

Most of you know my life went on. I raised my kids, lost one to heart disease and let the other go to the Gods of maturity. Thankfully he has begun his own altar, and hopefully leaving plenty of trinkets for them. I often find myself selfishly wanting my life to go back to the times when we were carefree (and young). Woke up to those two lovely faces of joy each day. Feel their hugs, even if it was chilly or overly hot in our meager rental property owned by their dad's parents.

I am not saying I didn't feel cheated somehow. There were lots of moments wishing I could give them (kids, family and friends) more, find a cure for what ailed us, literally. Along with thoughts of how could someone like Oprah have so much money, be so lucky, and yet she gave it away to so many, and I could not get some of the pie. A piece of the sweet life. Yes, don't we all. But I have been told and maybe guess, money can create other problems. It would be nice to go out and pay for things when one feels like it. Face it, and be honest we all feel this way.

The years go by and I am learning to enjoy the simple life. Cleaning the clutter out of the closets. Yes, I would give anything to have a moment of Anelisa in my arms, but I know it is just how life rolls. We are not here forever. This is only a small fragment of life as we know it. As Oprah continues to give what she has to others. Even if it is more advice now than cars, homes, and twenty minutes of running through toys-r-us when kids go without. She did give me something tonight. A moment to realize that I have 'Come Alive'.

Thanks Oprah. And thanks to all of you who share my most intimate thoughts week after week. I hope your life has those precious moments when you realize money has no value against the best gift of all...loving yourself. I am blessed.

I worked my rear end off and was provided for in so many ways.

Now, I have to pack for a wedding and Korea, planes wait for no one. Yikes, where do I even begin...


Jim K. said...

You got your existential compass
aimed right. And right intention
should count for a lot with Oprah.
It's hard for her to give in the
face of resentment. And
you...without continuous struggle,
where would you be?
It's awesome that you walk
on and try flavors. History shows
change and recovering from hard
hits wins more wars than perfection
out of the gate.

Thinking very similar thoughts
on de-cluttering. It's time to
winnow down the house.

Debbie said...

Hi beautifully alive Elizabeth! I've been reading and catching up here . . .and loving it all. :) The French Foreign Legion hat is just too funny. haha! I'm so glad you have a sense of humor and your hubby appreciates it. God bless you as you travel to Korea to see your son!

Anonymous said...

This is so heartwrenching and at the same time comforting to know that you are somehow okay after all. And Oprah was there, the constant all that time. Isn't that funny? Maybe symbolic of hope, or God, or something else that shows the strenght of your spirit. Let's keep going on, even stronger and sweeter than before.

Tara said...

What a fun picture to start your post. It is hard when we sit and wish for all the things we do not have. Yet, in noting what we don't have, I think we find strengths that truly define who we are.

I saw a cute sign at a shop during our recent vacation. The words: Money does not buy happiness. Those with 10 million dollars are no happier than those with 9 million.

I hope you are having a great week. Thank you for yet another wonderful post!