Is this what it looks like in heaven
beyond the clouds
passing layers of atmosphere and space
A maze for the child
inside us all is the desire
to break through
go to heights we have never reached
super power strength
speeding through the top
materials seen as obstacles
which would not hurt us
if we would just climb
examine each floor
becoming stronger
letting time and gravity
lift us like God's angels
7 comments:
I'm intrigued by this. I like the idea of the maze for the child inside of us but then some of the other language feels just a bit cliched but I think you have a good start!
indeed....cool nucleus..
nicking 1 or 2 leading words
of the start of many lines
might un-commonize and cool up the
feel.
there's a nice haunting drift
to it overall.. a little
chesire grammar, while you have
it lowercased...a little shoe-gaze
One step at a time and nothing looks daunting. I like the poem and understand the human reaction to feel trapped before we use logic and common sense.
But...The photo reminds me of the last thing that someone sees at San Quentin Prison just before he is executed. I don't know why. It feels like a trap that has no way out.
Hey guys I agree with all of you, this was a quickie I threw together, but feel Farmlady has a point- very complicated photo, and was the lobby of a hotel in Spain, when you looked up from one of the chairs. Each floor is the hotel rooms, cool huh?
Very very complicated piece of art someone created when they designed it!
I might not ever touch this piece again, but who knows...Jim you drift up from corner to corner, edge to edge...
I get dizzy looking at the photo.
I was imagining my force of will
pressing the cube wall into
a tunnel and tearing through the
wire web snares of this tech life.
Makes me wonder if our heavens and hells are starting to look as high-tech as our mortal worlds....
What a great photo and poem! I love what you can come up with so quick! You amaze me!
What did the photo remind me of or stir up? One word came to me . . .patience. ha!
Thanks Chef E!
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