Friday, March 11, 2011

Some Confessional Creative TMI

















Not much writing going on the past three days.

Even today has been void of ideas to paper. I know do we always have time to write? 

I now realize, or should I say "I remember why I did not write much before my cafe closed three years ago". Wow. Isn't it funny how time goes by in what may seem like... a virtual bullet train. You bought your destination ticket, say to do a NaNoWrite, and then just as you step up to the yellow line on the platform and look to see if the train is on time...you hear the sounds. A rushing. Like in the movies when water has burst over the dam. You can hear the gears, or wheels on the tracks, as the pinions and metal clash together. Then WHOOSH; it takes your breathe as it shoots past the platform. A killer moment. Did you feel that? Do you take the time to lose yourself in those moments? You do. You really do.

You realize your train is not far behind. But you also realize, minutes have passed you by. Waiting has passed. In a 'waking' moment we see how time got on that passing bullet train and left us behind. Why didn't we take that train? Hmmm. Not sure really. Maybe I didn't know about it? Silly me. We know what works for us. There is purpose to everything, right?

Yep, after working two long days in a row. Soaking in the recipes for the gourmet food products. Lifting. Sorting. Mise en place. Mixing. Bagging. Oh and do not forget the measurements. The digital scale. Gosh I had not used one of those since culinary school. Never needed one, as I only made desserts on a smaller scale. There is that word again, scale. A way to measure time, in our minds. Okay, back to my work day. Testing new flavors. I love that part of the job *big smile*. Wrapping and freezing. Yes, when I was hired to consult with this company last year, I made suggestions upon watching the women work, that she should freeze the product before rolling it out. It helps make the dough more pliable to shape. Like when you want to get precise slices of meats, you freeze them. Something I picked up along the way.

The first day, when I got back into my van to drive home...and Phew! was I tired.

The second day...I was looking forward to the weekend. LOL. The opposite of my job years ago. Weekends were the killer. The busy of culinary and hospitality. Unless you work conventions in hotel. They have long work weeks period.

I was contacted by a local college to submit my resume for a teaching position. I did it. Updated my resume and sent it, since they had an old copy. Do I really want to work full time? No. Why? Because, as I started off saying...I remember why I did not write. Hardly at all. I love writing again. If I take on too many jobs, which I love what I do and staying busy, I might be too tired to hit these keys, or scribble in my notebooks. There was purpose in my life as it was. But I have a choice now.

I am waiting at a platform, and am just going to enjoy the WHOOSH! go by. I might even just sit here on a bench and write a story about how working this new job has reminded me of who 'I' really am.

It also gives me some good writing materials. I wrote Haiku in the flour before we cleaned up. The girls were amused. Next time I will take a photo of that good use of time.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

I Cannot Stop Writing- Redo
















The Second Hand Of The Clock Stopped Moving

I.

I picked up a poetry book, and began reading where I had just left off. A few lines later nothing seemed to pique my interest. Not the computer, reading my email, or did listening to the treadmill motor as my husband walked behind me. I decided turning on music would only stir my thoughts even more. I had become antsy this afternoon and felt like a twelve year old again.

II.

Often in eighth grade when there was only ten minutes left before class ended. The teacher would instruct us us to start any unfinished homework in what she called free time. I gave into boredom; twirled my hair; lifted my shirt to scratch my belly, and then stuck my hands down in my baggy jeans in a Napoleon gesture. I sighed loudly as I looked out the window and saw last period gym class still running around the track. Because my desk was in the back row it was easy to keep my book open, but start packing up my supplies so I could quickly get out of the classroom. When I was done I noticed the tip of my pencil seemed dull. I walked slowly up to the pencil sharpener. Now at the front of the class the teacher would look at me with a frowning sneer as they looked up at the big round clock. Like my plan for escape was about to be foiled. If I could get away with it, the kids outside would come along; lift the windows open, everyone would scream deliriously, then jump out of our seats, and leap onto the grass below. But the class remained reverently silent. Without a minute’s notice the school bell rang in chaos. Anyone with any sense scurried towards the open door, and out into the hallway.

III.

Looking down at my watch I announced to my husband it was time for me to start making dinner. Hopping off the couch and heading toward the kitchen to the rhythm of his feet, I would start my next assignment. Under my breath I began grumbling, “could this day go any slower”.

I remove my work after a few days. Thanks for reading- Elizabeth

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

May You Be Blessed

I knew I was blessed when Lucinda Williams new album was in my mailbox, well in the CD form of course!

Right now I am sitting back doing some revisions and listening to her double album, and this is the title 'Blessed'. I tried to find a release on youtube, and this not so good camera phone version will give you a hint of whats to come. Her album was just released yesterday, and I really enjoy her lyrics and poetry.

Are you often inspired by music, yes I know you are Jim K., because you post some good ones on your site!

I am taking a much needed rest from posting my work on here. Need to do more revisions and work on my next manuscript with Pasquale. Enjoy!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Happy Birthday Anelisa!

















Today is my daughters 25th birthday!

I miss you girl, but I still feel your arms around me, and the laughter! Here is a piece from my manuscript- which originally (not this exact poem) Jessie Carty suggested I begin writing about my experiences with loss, and move toward my first book...

Conversation with My Daughter

I can only imagine what it was like
when you took your last breath

The nurse told me you woke up from surgery
she asked you if you wanted a drink

as the light shined brightly over you
the heart pumped rhythmic songs of life

I imagine your eyes wide open
fear and adrenaline trying to make sense of the moment

did you want mom, or those darn cats
who waited outside the house for your return

I was told Oreo moved in with the neighbor
an older lonelier woman

cats may sense things as time ticks away
that they hold grudges

when loved ones go missing
some may even have no problem moving on

unlike humans who cling to thoughts